Friday, May 8, 2020

Bad Idea Rides ™


My friend the Professor invented Bad Idea Rides ™ Or at the least took them to 11. Made them a brand. What exactly is a Bad Idea Ride ™? Cycling has lots of rules. Road riders have entire books full of rules. Even with rules about sock length and color. Lots of the rules around cycling are about safety for sure but more seem to be about cosplaying some fetishization of what is the ideal euro Hardman (or Hardwoman) lifestyle. I never really bought into cycling's "rules"  It is probably why I got into CX and Mtb instead of road cycling. I have nothing against road cycling. I love riding roads. But mostly as a way to get me to some sick trails. Ok so what is a Bad Idea Ride ™ and what are the rules. First there are no rules. Second the whole point of a Bad Idea Ride ™ is to take you out of your comfort zone. To go back to when you were a kid and just rode for fun. No plan. No agenda. Just to surf the earth. 


Yesterday I set out on a #DIYgravel ride with no plan other than to surf the earth. Followed the Bay Circuit Trail for a bit. Got lost. Got back on track. Got lost again. In between it was like taking a trip in the hot tub time machine to my childhood. Kids were on bikes. Tons. Of all ages and without a parent. And they were happy and doing fine. I bumped into two 10 year olds stuck in a mud bog. Or playing in it. Not sure which. These rides lately have been an epiphany. I came across huge trees down across the trail. I climbed over them. Saw tons of wild turkeys. Rode across farm fields. Startled two huge deer that ran across my path. Then saw a hawk with a bunny clutched in its claws as it flew right over my head. I rode through the Charles River. It was a good day. I trashed my bike. I came home covered in mud, ticks, poison ivy and god knows what else. But it was probably one of the most enjoyable rides I have been on in a long time.


A Bad Idea Ride ™ should be just as the name implies. A Bad Idea. At least within the construct of how most of us define what a "good" bike ride is. No training happens on a ride like this. Half the idea is to get lost or to have to figure out a trail without the help of a Garmin or some high tech device. Yes I used my phone a few times to drop a pin to see just where I was. But for 99% of the ride I was following trail blazes, tracks or signs. For me the best bike for a Bad Idea Ride is a CX bike. It just is a do everything bike. Always has been always will be. It is the perfect bike in my opinion. Especially a modern CX bike like my Stigmata. That bike has changed everything for me. It is the best road bike I have ever owned. The most capable woods bike I have ever ridden. And just an extension of myself at this point. That sounds bizarre but it is true. Now for you, your Bad Idea Bike might be a fat bike. Or a mtb. I mean if you want to take it up a notch and I know lots do this...ride your road bike with 25s. That is how we used to ride gravel. And it was mostly a bad idea. I mean I think Jesse had 5 flats that first year at Rasputitsa on his road bike. You do not need a special bike for a Bad Idea Ride™.



People don't like getting lost. I get it. But not all that wander are lost. I mean are you ever really lost? You may be temporarily off track. Or maybe don't know where you are exactly at the moment. But you are never lost. With racing canceled for the foreseeable future it is the PERFECT time to give a Bad Idea Ride™ a go. My friend the Professor's idea of a BIR would kill me. I do not have the fitness to do the type of mileage he likes. But what is nice about the Professor is he often posts up 3 distances. I usually go with the shorter ones. In this current crisis it is important to stay within your limits. My limits are different than yours. A Bad Idea Ride™ never is putting yourself at risk honestly. I am way more conservative on a Bad Idea Ride™ as most of the time I do not know what is around the corner. It could be a downed tree or a deer or a person forest bathing. These rides give you the chance to literally smell the flowers. Stop and take photos. Eat a snack by a waterfall.


Ideally a Bad Idea Ride™ would include a great crew. A couple of friends sharing the experience. For right now we have to ride solo. That is ok. My friends and I are doing the virtual BIR thing right now. We are constantly sharing photos and talking story about the stuff we saw on our ride. My favorite story to share is when I find a new trail. Or pop onto a trail or sector my friend shared with me long ago. I like all of you miss riding with friends. It is really one of the most unique things about cycling. Very few activities bring such diverse people together like cycling does. And it bonds us in a way that I just don't see in other hobbies or sports or what ever you want to classify cycling. To me cycling is, as my friend Marc once said, Beer League Softball. It really is the best description I have heard of this life we live.


So if you are like me and you need those moments in your life were you have to go into the woods to get in touch with your senses and reconnect with who you are try a Bad Idea Ride ™ I probably should have done a full Bad Idea Ride ™ The Rules, From Velominati. But I am not a member of the cycling illuminati. I am a dirt bag at best. The dirt bag code is unspoken and pretty simple. Never call the cops and never hit a dog. Pretty easy to follow in my opinion. Kidding aside the one rule for doing you own Bad Idea Ride™ is to just get out the door. Don't overthink it. It is ok to have a rough destination in mind. Maybe a pond or waterfall you want to sit by and have a snack. Or maybe a Llama Farm you heard about. One of my favorites is to go to a soft serve ice cream shack. Those are the destinations I love. I hope you all are staying safe and are well. If you have ideas for bad rides hit me up. I am always up for a Bad Idea Ride ™

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