Ain't no Rest for the Wicked

Can I see your hands in the air? Dana Prey cranked out about 10 push ups while doing a keg stand. It was impressive to say the least! That girl knows how to throw a party I will say that

One of the first conversations I had with SBZ aka Sara Bresnick-Zocchi was about how she always wanted a skinsuit party. But no one would ever throw her one. I thought it was pretty funny at the time. Here is this badass former world cup racing elite mountain biker talking about skinsuit parties when all I am interested in is learning how to ride a mountain bike in New England without ending up in a body cast. SBZ basically took me under her wing this last summer and saved me from myself. I am forever in her debt! I still suck at riding mtn bikes but I at least don't jump off my bike at the mere hint of a drop off or a wood bridge. But I digress this is about SBZ. Sara is kind of like Clark Kent. When you meet her you do not even get one iota of the badass hiding behind the October hat and the prana t-shirts. She seems just kind of earthy crunchy and super chillax. Yeah and Clark Kent seems really nerdy and weak when you first meet him. But when SBZ comes out of that phone booth step aside man cause its either lead, follow or get the fuck out of the way. The pedal is to the metal and it is on!

SBZ clawing her way up Putney's brutal runup! She rode so well at Putney! Her teammate Sally took the W with Sara 2nd!

Thankfully she has some amazing friends. Like friends everyone dreams of having. They have her back and know how to blow off steam but also bring it. They are tough as nails but also just filled with personality. Just like her. And her friends love her to death. So they gave her what she really wanted for her 35th birthday. A skinsuit party. It was part house warming party for the new Crossresults.com teams frat house and part SBZ birthday bash. All the cool cats were there. They even let me and DJ Robert in! Well DJ is actually very cool I am just a dork. I can't help it it is who I am. The party was totally insane! Two of the funniest quotes of the night were " I went to art school and we never had parties like this" and " We had parties like this in California" I thought to myself yeah maybe in the Castro on Halloween..It just proved one more time that living clean is such a waste of life's precious nanoseconds. I mean really why bother? Keg stands, beer bongs, dance parties that would blow your mcl out, Murat in a speedo, Jello shots, Glenn Danzig...on and on and on. Were Resultsboy, Steven and I geeking out over a pair of brand new FMB fangos in a doorway while this was all going on? Yeah we were. It was that type of party. We were bikers after all.

Glenn Danzig and DJ...yeah it was that kind of party..

I gave DJ the heave ho around 12:30. I have much respect for that man. He partied like it was 1999! Me I didn't have a drop of alcohol. Not cause I am straight edge or anything but as I was the designated driver and had to keep it tight. But if you can get a contact high off 50 drunken bikers in skinsuits I sure did. I still do frankly. It got me sooo stoked to race in my skinsuit for Putney it wasn't even funny. I even thought about it as people were dancing and general mayhem was ensuing all around me. I hadn't rocked a skinsuit all cross season. Not once. Mostly I just wasn't in to it. Not sure why. But at the party? I was like Hell Yeah man! I will be rocking this beer stained, jello shot sprayed sweat covered Noir B sample at Putney. I hoped it wreaked of alcohol and sweat. Is that wrong? Probably but the whole point was and is you don't have to be so damn serious all the time. SBZ was doing keg stands friday night and got 2nd in the elite field at Putney on sunday. Would she have won if she had gotten 12 hours of sleep both nights? Who knows and frankly who cares? The crossresults.com team kit has skulls and bones on it there should be a rock and roll clause in each rider's contract...

But back to what I was thinking about all night while laughing my ass off talking to so many drunken bikers on Friday night. Putney. It is possibly the pinnacle of New England cross. Gloucester and Noho obviously are beyond compare but Putney? If you want to consider yourself a New England crosser you MUST do Putney at least once. Preferably you will hold it in the reverence that it deserves. It is like Pipeline for surfers. If you have never dropped into a double overhead wave at Pipeline are you a surfer? I guess you are sort of. But being able to ride pipeline is the thing of legends. Putney is the same. It can chew you up and spit you out like no other race. It is unapologetically brutal. Even in "good" conditions like we had sunday it poses a lot of challenges that we just don't see at any other race. There is the corn field where the souls of the weak are crushed, there is the drop off and the runnup. It is NOT a grass crit. And then there is the vibe which is the complete opposite of the buzz saw of a course. West Hill has put this race on for a long time. It is such a downhome feel. Kids have a burrito stand everyone hangs around eating cider donuts and just having a great day. Its what you think Vermont should be.

I lucked out this year. Not only was I completely jacked and stacked to wear my skinsuit I had two uber fast guys in my van. You know what the secret to getting faster is? No its not training that is for the weak. It is hanging around fast people. The skinsuit party is a perfect example. I picked up at least 3 spots just by osmosis at that party. I got another 2-3 by having David Wilcox and Matt Myette in the van with me on the ride to Vermont. I am kidding, sort of. Being able to pre-ride a race course with people like David and Matt is almost an unfair advantage. They see EVERYTHING. All the good lines, where to make moves etc. They don't even need to articulate it just by following you get a radar lock on how to go fast.

I had the best race of my whole entire season on sunday. I have been getting a lot of mentoring from a lot of really fast people. I am really, really lucky to have the friends I have. I think when you pack four of the sexiest steel cross bikes into a manvan good things are bound to happen. So I have my wingmen for the rest of the season. If you have a cxey steel bike and bring Newmans mint oreo's we might consider letting you hitch a ride with us...maybe...Oh and the other guys in the van yeah they did pretty ok in their races as well! David Wilcox rocked out to 2nd in the elite men and Matt got 3rd in the 35+! Thanks to all my biker friends for this wild ride of a cross season! I don't want it to ever stop...

Oh I almost forgot one of the best parts of the whole day/race. On like my third lap I come crawling and clawing my way up the Runnup. I see Joy to my right with a hupcake handed out. I grab that hand up take a HUGE bite and pedal as fast as I can. I get a huge piece stuck in the back of my throat! I literally think I am going to choke to death. I finally swallow it but am now gagging for about two laps. When the pure sugar finally hits my brain it is like someone strapped a jet pack to my bike! Thank you Joy and Kim for making the Hupcakes and making cross sooo much fun this season. You two are the BEST!